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He should have stuck with 911. They're very friendly over there.

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Siri's Jokes Border on the Inappropriate

Siri's Jokes Border on the Inappropriate

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'You really have to shut up and listen': Guy walks into job interview with a 99% chance of getting hired, gets told to shut up and blows it in under 15 minutes

'You really have to shut up and listen': Guy walks into job interview with a 99% chance of getting hired, gets told to shut up and blows it in under 15 minutes

‘I told them I don't care, it's my property, not her's’: Neighbor allows caterers to park in next-door couple's driveway without their consent, then both the neighbor and catering company cause a scene when the couple confronts them

‘I told them I don't care, it's my property, not her's’: Neighbor allows caterers to park in next-door couple's driveway without their consent, then both the neighbor and catering company cause a scene when the couple confronts them

Entitled Kevin expects to get $3000 of chopped wood from his neighbor after making his tree-cutting process far more complicated; neighbor refuses to share: 'No wood for you'

Entitled Kevin expects to get $3000 of chopped wood from his neighbor after making his tree-cutting process far more complicated; neighbor refuses to share: 'No wood for you'

Husband does background check on brother-in-law for potential business deal, discovers he has a secret daughter, surprised wife tells their parents, causing family drama: 'I had no idea this child existed, my husband warned me I shouldn’t say anything'

Husband does background check on brother-in-law for potential business deal, discovers he has a secret daughter, surprised wife tells their parents, causing family drama: 'I had no idea this child existed, my husband warned me I shouldn’t say anything'

Worker who always comes to work 20 to 30 minutes early is late to work once, prompting reprimand from their boss, the next time they're late they show up 2.5 hours late instead: 'Same penalty for being 6 minutes late as for being 3 hours late? Ok boss'

Worker who always comes to work 20 to 30 minutes early is late to work once, prompting reprimand from their boss, the next time they're late they show up 2.5 hours late instead: 'Same penalty for being 6 minutes late as for being 3 hours late? Ok boss'

Boss demands employee message him when they're finished with a client and before meeting the next one, employee maliciously complies and the boss's demands hilariously backfire: ‘Needless to say, that rule was never mentioned again’

Boss demands employee message him when they're finished with a client and before meeting the next one, employee maliciously complies and the boss's demands hilariously backfire: ‘Needless to say, that rule was never mentioned again’